Sweat bleeds from trembling skin,
shaky fingers digging
into a head housing a mind lost, spinning again
scratching memories, hitting the books,
bloody skin beneath fingernails, exposed bones of my fists,
all in search for a solvent, a cure for the plague
of haunting questions, the secrets
you buried deep in the rich soils of mind,
closure to bring on the next chapter
as through my mangled webwork I meander,
hopelessly tangled, lost in this space
as the clock winds down.
All of your whispers echo through time,
culminate in the soundtrack to my waste of a life.
Belief is of no interest, I need to know,
denied this understanding that could help guide my growth
all while I have embraced this stagnation
my path of uncertainty earned
smothering in my frustration,
locked in obsession,
morbid and motionless,
drunk on my shame, high on denial.
Need to break out, the only way through.
I need to wake up, chew through my cocoon.
Sick with need, tormented by
the erosion of patience,
the absence of reason,
the aching seeds in my mind
awaiting their season.